How Not to Go Shopping

Well, I made one of the biggest mistakes a mother can make: I said to my family Friday night that I wanted to go shopping for myself sometime this weekend. Big mistake, and I knew it too as soon as it escaped from my mouth, so I tried to cover myself with a lame, “if I get the chance.” Now those of you new to motherhood may not know that in order to get some alone time in the mall, everything has to be cosmically perfect, and one way to knock the planets out of line is to voice your wish. This has happened to me way too many times for it to be just a coincidence.

Ilness strikes

Everything seemed to be ok, but early - very early- Saturday morning, my son comes in complaining loudly of a sore stomach. Now since we had a pretty early dinner Friday night and the kids didn’t have a snack before bed, I just figured he was hungry, so I fed him. Oh how wrong this was… The only plus in all this is that he finally can get to the toilet-or at least he did that first time. (His small garbage can took a beating the rest of the time and is now sitting on the back porch after I hit it full blast with the hose. I got some back spray in my face, and after gagging profusely-I better not get sick-I started questioning my choice to clean the thing. Don’t they have these in Wal-Mart for only a couple bucks?) I won’t go into too many details, but I will say that when the boy gets sick, he gets sick, and he makes sure everyone knows it. (He is not known for curling up in a ball in his room, quietly suffering-he writhes in pain, with more than a little moaning on the side.) My husband and I were losing patience with this illness by Sunday evening. Strike one.

The weather

Now my husband had also made a proclamation around the same time I mentioned my possible shopping trip. If the weather cooperated, he was going to replace our front door with the one we purchased not too long ago, and maybe get it primed and painted on Sunday. Yippee! Sounds like fun to me-not! How can I complain, though? I was the one who said we needed a new door, and I was the one who was nagging him about putting it up, but the fact is, if he did this chore, I would be involved as well, and I wanted the mall. I was secretly hoping for rain, but weather wishes never come true, and it was warm and sunny all blasted weekend long! And, just as I predicted, I was the "hold it here honey" girl, while he tacked and cut, and got the door in. Strike two.

All the other stuff

In the midst of these two memorable weekend events, I was running my daughter back and forth to practice, and then to Old Navy for a couple clothing exchanges. I also noted that since the weather was so nice and I had to be close to home due to my "hold it here honey" and nursemaind duties, I could hang the laundry out on the line to dry, and then there was painting the door Sunday, and I might as well work on the design of my blog, and we needed whites washed, and groceries…Strike three.

Well the weekend ended, I didn’t get in a shopping trip, and I stayed home with my son today because he still hadn’t really eaten anything other than a banana. I am looking into the future and I see a shopping trip sometime in the days ahead, but this time I will wait until I am in my car heading down the driveway before I shout from an open car window, “Hey,dear, I’m going to make a quick run to the mall.” You just don’t mess with those cosmic forces...

What do you think?

Since I had plenty of "at home time" this weekend, I was determined to finally take the time design a new background, fix my new logo, and customize coloring for my site. Let me know what you think... (Be honest. I was worried that my bubbles in the background may look like pills, so the site "family formula" would have an entirely different meaning, LOL! I may make them molecules instead...  I am also unsure about the outside border.  I wanted blue with a pop of yellow, but things are looking pretty bright.)

By the way, some of you have grab buttons with the html code to go with them. How do I get this on mine? (I have the button.) Thanks a bunch. (New "real" post coming later today.)

A Word Between Friends

Ok, Janie B from Life Not Wasted or Lost offered a chance at a little word play a few days ago where she would provide the words and I could write my feelings pertaining to these words. Take a look...

1. October : This is one of the months (next to Christmas and birthdays that is) that my kids look forward to the most, and truthfully, I have always enjoyed it too. When I was younger, the thought of "being someone or something else," even just for one night, was pretty exciting, and when I was first married, I often dragged my husband to Halloween dances and costume contests. The last time I did this, I was four months pregnant with my daughter, and I was a corpse in a casket with my husband as a gravedigger. We won first place in one contest and third in another, and this is something I want to get back to when my kids are older and don't want to spend time with old mom and dad.

2. computers: I have a love/hate relationship with technology. On the one hand, as a computer science teacher, I love what technology can do and I often find myself comparing new technology "toys" with my students. But when something doesn't work, it just about drives me crazy, and when it comes to computer problems here at home, I am the one who has to keep things running. (My kids got a virus in their computer and I was up until around 1:00 trying to keep from having to reformat the hard drive. Well, long story short, I fixed their computer, but I felt I never left work.)
I also know that too much of even a good thing can be detrimental, and I know some of my students stay up until the wee hours of the morning playing all these tech games. Lack of sleep = poor performance = poor health = poor personal relationships. (Unfortunately, I do this as well, like when I was working on my new blog logo and site appearance-and I am still not satisfied with it...)

3. parenting : I would like to say that I have this parent thing mastered, but everyone would know I was lying. I checked out a video that Heather at Theta Mom had on her site about some mothers being alpha or beta, but I don't like labels especially when it comes to what kind of mother you are, just like I feel that not everything in the world is black or white. There are many in-betweens, and I think I am one of those mothers. I feel strongly about some things when it comes to my kids, but there are other times that I take more of a laid back approach with situations that I don't think are dire. Just take one thing at a time, right?

4. holidays:  Holidays with a family, especially a family with small children, are wonderful, and my husband and I go all out to make things magical. Since my daughter is beginning to out-grow some of the childhood fantasies such as the Easter Bunny and unfortunately the tooth fairy too (I had to fess up recently after she saw her tooth sitting in a glass on my night stand-ok, I know it's gross, but I didn't want to save a bloody tooth, and I forgot about it. I think Sarah at Mommy Lite jinxed me because I haven't messed up a tooth pickup in a while... Check out her site for some cute tooth fairy stories!)

Santa Clause is now in danger so last year we really freaked my daughter out. I got some bells, and my husband grabbed my exercise ball (finally it was good for something other than sitting in a corner), and come midnight my husband jingled the bells outside the kids windows while at the same time tossing the ball on the roof. He did pretty good until he threw the ball with a little too much gusto and it bounced pretty rapidly along the length of the roof and off the other side where it continued to roll to the street. He took off as fast as he could because it was heading in the direction of a passing motorist! The ball was saved, my daughter described how she heard Santa's sleight skidding on the rooftop, and my son heard nothing-he slept through the whole thing. (Oh well, there's always next year!)

5. popcorn:  Well, what's not to like about popcorn? I buy this in bulk because it's the favorite snack for our movie nights. I only wish that our microwave wasn't so unpredictable. I can't just plunk the bag down and wait for the timer. Too many batches of scorched popcorn (yes, it took more than one scorching-I'm not a quick learner) taught me this fact, and because of all the starving people in India (at least this is what my mother told me when I was younger) I can't just chuck the bag and get out another. I try to pick through the burnt kernels and salvage what I can. (Notice I said I not we-I pop everyone else another bag. I can be weird sometimes...)

Now Janie, how did I do with my first homework assignment? I really enjoyed this exercise, and I hope everyone else did too.

Time and I are Not Friends

Time, the ever-elusive element of our day, has never been a friend of mine-not ever. As a child, I was incessantly late-or almost late-to everything: school, scout meetings, choir practice, church, and the list could go on and on.  This drove my mother batty, because with three other daughters, nagging just me about getting ready was nearly impossible. In college I was able to get a handle on my time disability mainly because I had to-professors are not known for waiting to see if and why a student is in clas.  But being the first person at a, let’s just say, a gathering, wasn’t cool, so I couldn't kick the lateness habbit altogether.

 

Fast forward

Now, years later (I will never reveal the number equivalent because I just now realized how big that number is and I am in shock), I would like to say that I have perfected my time management skills, but I still have lapses where I am racing against the clock to try to get somewhere, often mumbling words to myself that I wouldn’t dare out loud. Why do I do this to myself? I had grades to enter and a host of other things to do at the end of my day today, and I was fully aware of Mr. Time while I was doing them, but I still tried to squeeze in just one more activity before it was time to leave. (I had plenty of time...) The end result: I headed out my classroom door only to run back in because I forgot my cell phone (tic, tock), I ran out the door and into a teacher friend of mine who wanted to chat (tic, tock), and got behind a large gasoline truck going 20 miles under the speed limit (tic, tock, tic, tock), then pulled into my driveway just as the kids' bus was coming down the road. And like everything, when you are late for one thing, it snowballs into the rest of your day. I had no down time between taking care of someone else’s kids and taking care of my own-some days I really need this-and as soon as my kids walked through the door it was time to start driving to practice, then I had to come home and start dinner, and so on, and so on… (This reminds me of a line from a commercial... Man, I need to lay off the TV and read a book!)

Time for Chilling

So here I sit, typing this blog post-so thankful to have an outlet where I can unload and be understood. Recently it has gotten even more special because of three unique women from my new on-line community. They not only listened to me gripe and moan without judgment, but they comment regularly to let me know I am not alone, and this week they gave my blog some awards. Molly from Im a Sleeper Baker gave me the over the top award.

I will try not to disappoint anyone in future posts. I am now supposed to pass this along to six other deserving blogs, so here is my list:

Nancy from If Evolution Works has one cool looking site, and her posts are often very humorous.

Sarah from Mommy Lite offers a hilarious take on every day life with kids, but since she just received this award from another blogger, let’s spare her another 6-member list…

Chef Eureka from Two Peas in a Pod , a newly discovered blog that has become a favorite read due to her insightful postings.

The Girl with the Flour in Her Hair at Peeling an Orange with a Screwdriver because of her very funny(and sometimes heart wrenching) posts.

Flory from A Woman's Life Stages because of her beautiful site and often thought provoking topics.

Janie B. from Life Not Wasted or Lost because her site is extremely eye-catching, her posts are often unique, moving topics, and because she never fails to brighten my posts with heart-felt comments. Thanks Janie.

I also received the lovely blogger award from two of my favorite blogs (see list above:)

Flory A Woman's Life Stages and

Janie
Life Not Wasted or Lost and I am now supposed to pass this on to 15 deserving blogs that I have since discovered, but I am getting tired (time is winning again!), so I will try to get this together over the next few days.

Thank you ladies. I have really enjoyed spending time with you this evening, and I look forward to more in the future.
Oops, I almost forgot. The Over the Top award requires me to answer these questions, so here it goes:

Where is your cell phone?
Normally in my purse, right now on the table.

Your hair?
thick

Your mother
dependable

Your father?
crafty

Your favorite food?
burgers

Your dream last night?
don't remember

Your favorite drink?
slow gin fizz(at least it was in college)

Your dream/goal?
early retirement

What room are you in?
living room

Your hobby?
Blogging

Your fear?
death/ilness

Where do you want to be in six years?
anywhere with my family

Where were you last night?
Back to school night

Something you aren't?
even tempered

Muffins?
cinamon/brown sugar

Wish list item?
house addition

Where did you grow up?
Pittsburgh area

Last thing you did?
took the dog out

What are you wearing?
sweat shirt and sweats

Your TV?
off

Your pets?
1 dog, fish

Your friends?
3 good friends, many aquaintances

Your life?
busy

Your mood?
a bit cranky

Missing someone?
no

Vehicle?
mommy van

Something you're not wearing?
jewelry

Your favorite store?
Macy's

Your favorite color?
blue

When was the last time you laughed?
with my husband as son was telling a story

Last time you cried?
hmm...not sure

Your best friend?
from high school

One place that I go over and over?
beach (for vacation)

One person who emails me regularly?
mother

Favorite place to eat?
Chiles
This was one major list! My blog picks for this award gotta' do the time with this list too. (Make it easy on yourself and copy questions from my site and paste them on yours...)

The List

Ah, it’s Saturday, a most treasured day to us working folks, and one that I set aside to do things with my family-I should be happy, but I am slightly irritated at the moment. The day started out well, even though I had to get up early to take my daughter to practice, and getting up early on a Saturday goes against everything I believe in.

A storm was brewing

My mood began to change the moment I decided to clean up around my house, so here I sit, a prepared list in my hands of all the things that really rankle my “rickles”(this is a word I made up when I get angry because it makes me laugh when I say it, and who can stay mad when they are laughing?)
So without further ado, I give you my “mother’s pet peeves list”-you might find we have some of these in common.

• Why am I the only person who can change the toilet paper roll?
  This fact really puzzles me because everyone knows where the toilet paper is kept, and everyone was shown how to change the roll when it gets empty, but the actual act is never completed. There is either an empty cardboard roll left for the unaware discoverer-often me- or the new roll has made its way into the bathroom but hasn’t found its way onto the toilet paper holder. I have interrogated the natives around here, but no one seems to know the answer-or speak the same language, so the puzzle lives on, and I remain baffled.

• And speaking of bathrooms, why am I the only one who can clean the toilet bowl?  Now I should mention that my husband saw a possible storm developing-I gave him “the look”- and he did clean the toilet today, but I can count the times he has done it in the past, and there aren’t many. I am trying to think back to our wedding vows, but I don’t recall saying anything about toilets. I mean there was the, “…to have and to hold, from this day forward,” but I don’t remember any, “ for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, to clean the toilet so you don’t have to” part.
  
  

• And while we are on the subject of dirt itself, why am I the only one in the house who even sees the dirt?  When last checked, both kids had 20/10 eyesight, and although my husband has started using bifocals to see close, there is nothing wrong with his distance vision. I mean the man can spot a deer in a brown field while driving, whereas the rest of us squint in the direction but see nothing. Is there such a thing as dirt blindness-similar to color blindness but those afflicted just couldn’t see the brown and green shades of mud and grass tracked in off the bottom of dirty sneakers? It would certainly explain a lot around here, and it would stop me from torturing myself with little tests to see how long anyone in my family notices a fuzz ball lying on the bathroom floor (my last test lasted a week, and that was because I just couldn’t stand it anymore and I picked the blasted thing up!)
  

The list could go on

I keep thinking of more and more peeves the longer I type, so it would be easy to add to my list, but what would be the use? I remember reading a book titled-I think-Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff-and the items on this list are just that-small stuff. I figured out a long time ago that I am alone, an outsider, when it comes to my feelings about a clean house. The other inhabitants around here have won, and that may not be such a bad thing. I mean, as long as I can live in a semi-clean environment, and get help when things get past that semi-clean nature, I am appeased. Besides, I can either spend all day cleaning or spend that time playing with my kids, and I will always come down on the side of my kids.

Addicted to Blogging

I have a problem: I am addicted to blogging and everything that it entails, but I don’t think there is a 12 step program that can help me, or even a name for this ailment, so like a good blogger, I will enlighten you, my blogging compatriots, in the hopes that it will help end my suffering and possibly yours.

How this all started

The predicament I’m in sort of snuck up on me, so I am not really sure exactly when the addiction was formed, but I do know that I lacked a creative outlet and a friend suggested I start a blog. I remember the conversation like it was yesterday.
Said the friend, “I read that if you want to get back into writing you should start a blog.”
To which I quickly replied, “A what? A log?”

“Not a log, a BLOG. You can write about anything.” Hmm… Would anyone listen to what I had to say?

The listeners in my life: Students

My students don’t listen.
Here’s a conversation I had on Tuesday:

“Complete the questions from section 2 on page 27 for Thursday. You will have two days to do them, and you don’t have to include the vocabulary terms. We will go over those tomorrow in class.”

“Do we have to do the vocabulary terms?”

“No, you don’t have to do the vocabulary terms.”

Thursday rolls around and these are the comments from several students:

“I thought you said we only had to do the vocabulary terms?”

“No, she said we wouldn’t have homework for two days.”

“We had homework today?”

“I just did question number 27.”

And people wonder why teachers need time off in the summer…

My husband

My husband listens occasionally (at least I like to think he does) but he isn’t very reliable.

(Me)”Are you going to pick her up from practice tonight so I can go work out?”

(Him) “Sure, sure.”

45 minutes later when I am at the gym, my cell phone rings.

(Him)“Are you going to pick her up tonight?”

(Um, didn't I have this conversation? I am getting that "deja vous" feeling...)
(Me) “I thought you said you would do it?”

(Him) “Yea, I guess I can do it. Do you want me to take the boy?” (This is how we sometimes refer to my son, but that’s a whole other post).

(Me) “Well, I am almost done, but I don’t know if I can make it home before you have to leave…”

(Him) “Ok, well do your best.”

I call 10 minutes later

(Me-being the helpful person that I am) “I’m on my way home. You won’t have to take him with you.”

(Him)"Oh, you don't have to rush home. I'm taking him with me."
I decide to just roll my eyes and sweetly end the conversation.

My kids

Then there are my children. I hope to instill in them worldly wisdom and good communication skills (this includes listening), but I am afraid I have an uphill battle ahead.

“You need to pick your toys before going outside.”

(Ten minutes later my son is outside and his toys are still scattered all over his room, but I realize I hadn’t made eye contact with him when I said this, so I broke a cardinal rule when it comes to compliance from my kids.)

I yelled from the kitchen window, “I asked you to clean up your room.”

“You did?”

“Yes, I did (eye contact made.) Come in and take care of it then you can go back outside.”

“Ok”

I busy myself with laundry and ten minutes goes quickly by. I go to my son’s bedroom to put his pile of clothes on his bed. There are the!*!*#!! Toys!!!!

I am shouting from the window, “Get in here and put away your toys!”

“I have to do it now?” (one, two, three, implode!)

Then there is my daughter. I make eye contact, she smiles in agreement, and then she does exactly what I told her not to do.

“Hey, don’t put that pencil on the couch.”

She smiles sweetly, “Ok mom.”

When she is done doing her homework and leaves the room, there is her blankety blank pencil lying on the couch!

“Why did you leave your pencil on the couch?”

She is still smiling sweetly and I am seething, “Oh, I forgot.”

Addiction or passion?

After further review of my sorry state, I have come to the joyful conclusion that blogging may now be an addiction of mine, but the people in my life drove me to it, and I think without it I will slowly lose whatever sanity I have left. So here’s to all you fellow blogger aficionados out there. Thanks for listening.

Enjoy Your Movie

I can’t believe it’s been six days since my last post, but things were particularly hectic the last few days-you know the kind of days where you feel you should have both a taxicab sign on your car and a maid's uniform? But even though things were pretty crazy, I did something I haven’t done in a while-I watched and listened to my kids.

Now you are all probably rolling your eyes right now while you try to figure out just what I am getting at. We all listen and watch our kids, but did you ever take a step back during the day and become an observer, not an active participant, watching your kids like you were viewing a movie about your life?

The car ride

It was during one of our fun-filled car rides to my daughter’s practice-you know the kind where you need to be there in 15 minutes but the kids get off the bus late, and the dog won’t do his business before you go, and then your son needs to go potty too, so now you have 10 minutes and the trip takes 20? Well, we finally pulled out of the driveway and I started playing a Journey CD to calm us all down, and pretty soon I hear a small, girly-girl voice from the back singing along. I just listened, entranced as my daughter sang in the quietest of voices, then my son piped in, complaining that she was singing too loudly and he couldn’t hear the song. (Ugh, here we go…) I was about to step in but stopped and listened as the two came to an agreement. At this point I thought who are these two and where are my actual children since compromise is not a word they understand, but the end result was that my daughter could sing but had to do it quieter and only during the chorus, and I thought that was a pretty good deal, and realized my kids are growing up...

The restaurant

The school week quickly passed and since everyone was pretty beat, we decided to treat ourselves to dinner at Chiles. This is my new favorite restaurant because they serve regular kid fare and Margaritas, and who could argue with that combination? (Ok, I’m kidding about the Margaritas. At about $4-$5 a glass in these economic times, plus the fact that having one would make me more than a little loopy, I passed, but it’s just the idea that if I wanted one I could have one and that means I am in a "grown up" restaurant and that makes me happy!)
Once again I took a step back as an active member and watched my family as we waited for our meals. My daughter was engrossed in her coloring so she didn’t notice me studying the time it took her to decide on a color scheme, and how peaceful her face seemed as she finished her project. My husband and son were sitting together, mainly because I don’t have the patience for my son’s constant movement during a meal (he is almost on my lap, and I need my space so I can chew in peace). Anyway, they were quite the noisy bunch due to a rather intense game of Tic Tac Toe. My husband is pretty shrewd because he is able to let my son win in the end without making it seem so obvious, and I sat there watching my freckly faced boy laughing at his latest conquest, and I remember thinking how lucky I am.

Bath time and beyond

Well, we are back to school and work once again, and once again things are hectic because my husband won’t be home until late, so it’s me to look over homework, get dinner, clean up, then do bath time, snacks, and the bedtime story. Phew! I finally got my daughter showered after several false starts, and then it was my son’s turn for a bath. I was going through the motions of rinse and repeat when I noticed his toes. I just happened to glance down and see him scrunch his toes up at the end of the bathtub, and I couldn’t help thinking how tiny they still looked, just like when he was a toddler. It was a comforting thought to think that my baby boy wasn’t growing up that fast.
Later, after our story and after my son was tucked in bed, I went into my daughter’s bedroom to wish her goodnight. I always sit on her bed and rub her back and hair-just as I did when she was a baby-and I listen as she animatedly tells me about four bees being on the bus during her ride home today and the escapade they caused, and once again I am the outsider watching the movie that is my life, and thoroughly enjoying the show…